what is love explain
Dear readers, I am writing this letter to you because there are so many people who have asked me what is love. I am not going to pretend that love has a right to be a strong word. There is no such thing as love without limits and boundaries. My definition of love is all that exists in our heart when we are willing to work out why we feel the way we feel about the other person. It is also what makes us happy. We must be willing to fall apart or give up. Our minds will wander off on many paths, but the only way to get back on track is by making it clear that we no longer want to keep talking anymore if you tell me how I'm feeling. This will require that both of us stop talking all the time for a very short period (like 10 days) while being able to find some words for each other from within ourselves. The hardest part is knowing at the same time what is love and what is control. But in the end, it isn't so hard once we realize just how much we do need that one another to live. It's true, we can die without your love or without the love of your family. You don't want to lose that either. They've got to live somewhere else. So here I am in my own apartment trying to figure out what you're doing in my absence. No help in sight.
I thought my life would be different after you left but I was wrong. When I'm with you, I feel like someone else who cares about me. Now that I'm alone, I feel lonely or empty. I'm sure we are both having moments where we don't feel loved, but we know that there's always an exit so we take our chances to look forward instead of backwards. When you leave me, there is no place of mine to go. If I had it my way, I'd be dead, like you. Yours alone and I have no idea how to make it feel any better. I think it's unfair that I have to wait longer than most people do at birth. If I had never met you, I wouldn't understand the gravity of the situation. Even though I have been waiting so long to move out of my parents' care, it still doesn't feel like enough. It feels like every breath I take counts against everything you're leaving behind. I don't even need you anymore, I need myself. I need this whole story to start over again. And you don't want me to be the last person who knows the truth. Maybe I have to look into yourself first, it might be okay. Why should I stay with you?
Dear reader, I'm writing this letter to ask you because that is the best time to talk. Don't worry about my emotions or my feelings toward you and more importantly, stay away from me when I'm upset. That's where the crying comes in. You're a stranger here. Not even me. Some stranger. Go away or go. It never works out. It seems that you didn't even think about it the day I started seeing red flags with your name on the internet. Or the day before you sent me those creepy messages asking if I knew why I couldn't see you. Those were the worst moments in my life that could make anyone feel like she's living a nightmare. Do I really need to be here? Are you worth it?
The reason I say goodbye to you the day before Christmas is not just because I can't believe that I'll see you again soon, it's because I know that you don't want me to go. I know you don't want me to call you but I can't. It's you, it's your decision. You're holding onto something that you don't even want. Of course, you won't even know that until December 25th. And then I will have a month to sit back and cry alone knowing that you're moving away. You have changed my life forever but I won't ever know unless you tell me how in you. And it won't be fair that I have to wait one month longer because you told me all along I am not worthy of your love. You made me sicker than I wanted to be and worse than I was capable of putting up with. But I shouldn't be so selfish. I know you don't want to leave. But you can't stay. You can't see me with another human being. I can't just turn around and stay and become you. We have to move forward. Without even looking back at that mirror in front of me the night of the accident, knowing that you're so scared and you can never take me back without feeling guilty. Knowing that you didn’t want to spend too much time with me that bad. Knowing that you want to get away. All these months gone by like time has never stopped. Time just moves on. How much does it mean to me what you did to me and to everyone I love? To leave everything I had just as soon as our relationship begun to be a tragedy?
You didn't come when I needed a savior. You came when I was ready to die but yet you made me stronger. And now, despite myself, I know that every single moment is a gift. A rare moment. One of great joy. And you don't deserve to die tomorrow. Nobody should have to spend their hard-earned money when they least need it. And I'd rather you stay with me, even if it means taking a little while to get used to living without you. Because I miss you. I love you.
I'm sorry for hurting you whenever and wherever I could. And I'll be damned if I ever see you again. Even though I hope that day comes as soon as possible. I will be with you on Thursday evenings if that’s what we have to do. Because your voice matters the most to me. Especially you. Because you make me smile from ear to ear. When all I do is stare at your face and hear the sound of your voice. Just to hear what happens inside your head. To feel your warm hand. To feel your touch. Even though I hope that day will never come, I feel ready for it. Ready for this moment to end. The moment when there is so much more I have to be thankful for. Being with you is what keeps me hopeful. For us to be together. Forever.
Had
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